Cry Victim (Wolf)
There are times when the most effective way to get what you desire is to cry victim (Wolf). Crying the victim has a disabling effect on clarity of thought. The very audacity to suggest that a victim of circumstance is actually sometimes a child of their own making is, in our society, considered preposterous.
When I went into rehab for gaining the victory over my alcohol addiction, I was to learn that I, only I, could gain the desired outcome. The private modern non-religiously affiliated rehab taught us that we needed to recognize a Higher Power. In resigning myself to that Higher Power, I had to relinquish my own determination that I was a victim of alcohol. In accepting this Higher Power, I was surrendering my will; my will that had originally concluded that I was a victim.
When the staff psychologist finally got me to upchuck the many, many reasons leading up to my careless, unthoughtful drinking binges; when I had totally convinced myself that I was justified in my shortcut to death; when, finally, I was done, I had told her of abuse in childhood. Infidelity. Church discipline. Religious fallout. An unhappy marriage to name a few.
Finally, she kindly asked, “Don, are you done? Have you got rid of it all?” Reluctantly, I admitted I couldn’t think of anything more.
She asked me next, “So, do you know what to do with it, now that you have it all off your chest?”
My head screamed, “NO-O-O!” I looked at her through my tearful emotion, “No, I don’t.”
The profound answer that followed could have knocked me over. She replied, “Now that you have spoken about all of it, you can put it behind you and move forward from here.” That was the beginning of a new chapter in my life.
I’m still too aggressive on occasion. At times I feel the victim. I forget to listen to the Lord telling me, “Why art thou wroth? And why is thy countenance fallen?” Verse 7. “If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door.” Aggression. Bullying. Victim. Many different faces.
